I know I churn out exactly the kind of self-help writing you find so objectionable, so please forgive me for containing an intellectual paradox I have yet to resolve, but I love your work.
Unattainable shit indeed! Living outside my parents house has proven unattainable for me. I've somehow developed a massive array of valuable entrepreneurship skills but still fail to build a life stable enough for the signing of a lease. I like living with my parents and they like having me so a couple months ago I said "fuck it, I'll just live with them indefinitely."
Also love your point about toppling cultural hegemonic systems. I have a crew cut, wear men's clothes, and have no makeup or purses. Women will talk big about toppling beauty standards, but those same women will pointedly comment to me about "those pants being too baggy in the ass" and "you would look great with just a little makeup" and that sort of thing.
Or my other favorite, "I could just never pull short hair off." Please. That sentence is a tacit admission that you're submitting to beauty standards. Want those beauty standards to go? The first place to get rid of them is in your own mind.
Thanks for reading (: